Yesterday I flew to San Francisco, and on my flight I had some time to think about my summer. It didn’t exactly start off as planned. In fact, it kinda sucked. I was dating a guy, I really liked him, but it just wasn’t right. We broke up before the summer even started, before we could go on any of the trips, weddings or vacations that were on our calendars. But, instead of jumping into a relationship with someone else to make me feel better, or dating for the sake of dating, I stayed single. Which, in New York, is definitely a decision. And I have to say, it was kinda great.
So without further ado, here are my top favorite things that I learned during my single summer:
1. Spending time by myself is fun. I know this sounds obvious, but I’m a really social person and I never really thought I could have as much fun by myself as I could with someone else. But now… I really can’t think of anything better than going to a movie, getting my own popcorn and seeing whatever cheesy movie I want, totally alone.
2. Going to weddings solo is effing fun. Yes, really. You get to dance with anyone you want, you get to meet way more people than you would otherwise and to be honest, you get a lot more attention:)
3. (Cue Beyoncé’s Independent Woman) Being single is empowering. As clichéd as it sounds, saying no to dates, saying no to feeling bad about being single, saying yes to putting yourself first, focusing on your career – it all feels really good.
4. I learned things. I find dating to be distracting, but this summer I had time to learn a lot about what I’m looking for, who I am, and what my goals are– because I had to time to do so. Which is a lot more than I can say about the last few years combined.
5. My focus shifted. All of a sudden I’m taking pie classes, photography classes, going on trips to visit my girlfriends, focusing on work, and all of my anxiety about dating has disappeared.
So tell me, does any of this ring true to you? I’d love to hear!